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::I see love everywhere I look. Valentines Day is a bizarre, twisted invention of a holiday, to celebrate for people who have found, at least for right now, maybe not tomorrow but right now, true love. I look at blogs and find traces or full-on rants about love and special-ness and what the hell. Sure it's lovely, I guess, if you're the one experiencing it. I'm not jealous because I am not searching for love, and only love, I'm searching for friendship and trust and truth. Is that so weird?
I read through my last rant. Lord, I sound conceited, after closer examination. Like, Whoa, I was this perfect little person with a perfect little life and boo-hoo, it's not perfect anymore what will I do? Like some sort of rich kid who's daddy isn't making a million a year but now only a quarter of a million and he must withdraw his promise of a Rolls-Royce and is now buying a Jag. I mean, it just sounds stupid. Really dumb. I would take it off, except I've kind of made a promise to myself not to delete anything I've written because sometimes old writing produces a spark of new inspiration. But it was still a stupid post.
I'm jumping from subject to subject and pessimistic on it all, I guess. So I should sign off now before I just become a complainer and boring and whiney. And I don't want to be a complainer. So I'll go sulk in my room instead of complaining to anyone who will listen, and turn up Rick's This Is Your Life really loud....
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.:Arakatze blogged on 2/08/2004 03:10:00 PM:.
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