.::Life as is::.
::Alyssa's home early.

3 days left.

Starting packing.

Graduation party was alright.  Very profitable though rather boring.  I'm over a thousand dollars richer now.

I wish I had had a graduation party in NC.  Could have invited the Sisterhood, the Hurds, the Goodwins, much of the Arts Team... it would have been great.

Hugged too many people yesterday.  *shudder*  I am not a fan of the hugging.  It was nearly as bad as when I visited CoH and shared the peace.  This is my bubble, please don't intrude.  Thanks!

My aunt is literally going crazy.  I feel bad for her as well as her kids who are getting seriously messed up because of this stuff.  As if they weren't enough already.

I talked to Ivo Graeber on the phone yesterday. :)
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/26/2004 09:42:00 AM:.
...
.::Randomness via Spork::.
::Hm...

I love Ken Jennings.

Five days until CB starts.

Graduation party Sunday...

It's great how items that are pure nostalgic rememberence can be helpful.

*hugs dried rose*

I'm supposed to talk to the Graebers on the phone tomorrow. :)

Spork.

I found a book that I think is directed right at me.  Eats, Shoots and Leaves.  It's a book for a true grammar nazi such as myself.

*hugs Meck journal*
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/24/2004 12:16:00 AM:.
...
.::Stuffness::.
::So... I get a trip for two weeks in the fall, and I get to pick anywhere in Europe that I want to go to.  I am going to Rome for four days in May.  This is BEYOND AWESOME!!!

I had a really comforting dream a couple nights ago.  If only it actually happened.  But it made me feel a lot better, because I had been going through an intense period of really missing someone.  It probably sounds really stupid.  But yeah... it was really calming.  Has anyone else had a dream like that?  It wasn't...like...I just read through the description and it sounds like some sort of...*cough* liking dream.  It wasn't that at all.  It was just something I guess I needed.

A quote from my host family info thing: "Irina is also very talented in the arts." :-D!!!!!!  And she's three days younger than me, that's so awesome.

um...I want the same dream again.  I think that's all for now.

It's one week.  Well, almost six days, it's really late...
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/22/2004 11:21:00 PM:.

.::Graebers, here I come!::.
::IHAVEANEWHOSTFAMILYIHAVEANEWHOSTFAMILYIHAVEANEWHOSTFAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!

I have a new host family :-)!!!!!!!

The Graeber family.  Irina is three days younger than me, her little brother Pierre is 11.  The dad is named Ivo, the mom is named Julia.  They've lived and travelled all over the world due to Ivo's job.  They live in Rheinbach, which is a little suburb of Bonn.  Irina likes dancing and music, Pierre likes soccer and computer games........... AHHHHH!!! I AM SO EXCITED!!!

::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/22/2004 10:22:00 AM:.
...
.::WLiiA? Scene to Rap... my favourite playing of this game :)::.
::Wayne:
Well, there we go, that's that
We better call the nurse right up here stat.
Because this guy he might lose his life race
Because you see he is a terminal case
We need a doc, and we need a nurse
Hurry to it stat, man, I can't rehearse
We gotta safe his life
He's got kids and wife
And if we're not careful, he'll go under the knife.

Greg:
O-oh-kay, so he's gonna die
But I gotta ask myself, why?
I don't know why I'm here, I'm a neurologist
I'm with you, and you're a proctologist
I'll get the nurse, so it's okay,
I'm gonna get the nurse, hey hey hey hey

Ryan:
Well I'm the doctor, on the go
And oddly enough my name's Dr. Know
If I could rap, that'd be a sensation,
But I can't, you see, I'm just a Caucasian.

Wayne:
We need some help, pron-to
Or else this man's life will soon go
Can't you do anything, won't you please
Because I'm begging you please, please

Ryan:
Well I know he's a man so he won't need a pap
But I'll take these two things and zap, zap, zap.

Colin:
Hey there buddies, look at him
He's dead he's dead and his name is Jim
What once was is no longer were
He's coming with me, I'm the Grim Reaper!
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/16/2004 02:25:00 PM:.
...
.::What would you say?::.
::It was a test we could all hope to pass
But none of us would want to take.
Faced with the choice to deny God to live,
For her, there was one choice to make.
 
This was her time. this was her dance.
She lived every moment; left nothing to chance.
She swam in the sea; drank of the deep;
Embraced the mystery of all she could be.
This was her time...
 
Though you are mourning and grieving with us,
Death died a long time ago;
Swallowed in life so that life carries on.
Still it’s so hard to let go.
 
This was her time. this was her dance.
She lived every moment; left nothing to chance.
She swam in the sea; drank of the deep;
Embraced the mystery of all she could be.
 
What if tomorrow, and what if today,
Faced with the question,Oh what would you say?
 
This is your time. this is your dance.
Live every moment. leave nothing to chance.
Swim in the sea. drink of the deep.
Follow the mercy and hear yourself praying.
 
Won’t you save me?
Won’t you save me?
This is your time. this is your dance.
Live every moment. leave nothing to chance.
Swim in the sea. drink of the deep.
Embrace the mystery of all you can be.
 
This is your time. this is your dance.
Live every moment. leave nothing to chance.
Swim in the sea. drink of the deep.
Embrace the mystery of all you can be.
 
This is your time...
(won’t you save me? )
(this is your time)
(won’t you save me? )
 
 
This song was written by Michael W Smith and is dedicated to the memory of Cassie Bernall.  She went to Columbine.  She had a gun held to her head, and was asked, "Do you believe in God?"  She said yes, he pulled the trigger, and she was killed.
So, faced with the question, what would you say?
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/15/2004 10:20:00 PM:.

.::Quizamania::.
::
Bluemarine:  Soft and subtle and definately
feminine.  You are classy and cute with a
little girl all grown up appeal.


 

Desire, the fifth of The Endless, yours is the
realm of lust, want, passion, and, of course,
desire. You tend to be selfish, only concerning
yourself with your own needs, and you have no
scruples about using your absolute draw over
the opposite sex to get your way. You love
being around people, because it's never long
before they give in to your will.

Which Endless are you?

(um, okay..?)
 
 


::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/15/2004 11:27:00 AM:.
...
.::Have you ever yelled 'Theatre!' in a crowded fire?::.
::OHhhhhh... that was incredible.
Inspiring.
Bart Mallard has such a great voice, it's even better live.
And Michael W Smith....WHOA. He can WRITE. The songs he played... whoa. I have the deepest respect for any guy who sings, plays piano, and composes. Particularly when it's that... well, that GOOD. *sigh*

Images!(that I found. since I wasn't allowed to take any or anything).
Michael W Smith, with Mercy Me in the corner. (Great pic of MWS, by the way, rather... good-looking...*cough*)



Michael again!



Five points if you guess who! And no, it's not obsession!



A better pic of all of Mercy Me.



David Crowder! Who looks actually like an emo kid who needs to find a razor. But it's all good. Very talented, anyway.
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/14/2004 01:07:00 AM:.
...
.::Me...::.
::
Faerie:
Faeries are sweet loving beings who love to help
people. They are not held back by reality and
love to dream and fly around. You probably are
very creative and although not the most popular
person in the world you are probably loved by
many for your sweet caring personality.


What Mythological Creature Are You (Many Results and Beautiful Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/13/2004 02:44:00 PM:.
...
.::If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place...::.
::But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now



Lyrics by Mercy Me. Song Homesick. It SO relates to my life right now. Okay, so... I took it a slightly non-Christian way in order FOR it to relate to my life right now... 'you' is someone who...well, never mind. Who doesn't know who they are. Doesn't matter. Home is... well, duh. Doesn't take much to figure that one out.
I hope they play this song at the concert on Tuesday.

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow...::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/11/2004 12:36:00 AM:.
...
.::Who among us does not love Nascar?::.
::MERCY ME!!!! MICHAEL W SMITH!!!! THE DAVID CROWDER BAND!!!! THREE OF MY FAVOURITE FIVE CHRISTIAN SINGERS!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND GUESS WHAT?!?!?!? I AM SEEING THEM IN CONCERT!!!!!!!! ON TUESDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*dies of excitement*

*is revived by thought of concert*

MERCY ME!! OH MY GOSH!! I AM GOING TO SEE MERCY ME LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And Michael W Smith who is, oh, probably the most famous Christian singer...ever! Mercy Me and Michael W Smith together make up SO many of the top hits in Contemporary Christian music... Whoa. I mean... WHOA! The only thing that could possibly make it better is if Rebecca St James (#1 fave) and Mark Schultz (#4 fave) were there... but... MERCY ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm so enthusiastic over this that I could faint... hahaha... *cheers*::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/09/2004 11:55:00 PM:.
...
.::Stolen::.
::[steal from Cassie's LJ]
This is the problem with LJ, we all think we are so close, and we know nothing about each other. I'm going to rectify it. I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Then post this in your LJ and find out what people don't know about you
[/steal]
I know I won't get half the response, though....lol.::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/08/2004 11:30:00 PM:.

.::Paul::.
::Apparently,

You're Paul!


The this is the which of the brothers you is quiz. z.
brought to you by Quizilla

I don't really know him; however, he was the most polite person at graduation, so I greatly appreciated is well-phrased question. A bit of a relief in an otherwise embarrassing night.::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/08/2004 11:14:00 PM:.

.::Whatever::.
::I've just realised something.
No one cares.
Oh well... so be it. I may as well be in Germany with the sadly freshly become I-have-a-life-and-I'm-back-to-it-so-I-don't-care-type friends instead of the cry-sob-gone-type... it's inevitable. It always happens. I know it. It usually does for me, too. I just wish I could keep it from happening. If I were to call...someone, it'd be a pleasant surprise, a oh-nice-to-hear-from-you call, and then life snaps back to normal and it's forgotten.
Oh well, whatever, I don't care, either.
Things fade. Promises to write slowly fall apart until only occasional letters arrive every six months; promises to call completely die; promises just fall apart. Probably Rick will forget about saying he'd be uploading songs; probably my friends will forget to write back; probably even my family won't call as much as they swear they're going to. I understand this. It's life. It has this strange habit of going on. Despite anything that happens.
I'm listening to my new Kensington CD. It's not Meck, but it's good Christian stuff... I just love anything Contemporary Christian.
OOH! I might get to see Michael W Smith and Mercy Me!!! In concert!!!! ON TUESDAY!!! *crosses fingers*
But..whatever. Just because I have no life and so am constantly contemplating things doesn't mean the world should stop. Doesn't mean others should stop doing things. It's just sad.

I'm researching like crazy. I love it. Isn't that weird, I've discovered I love researching. Looking up more Da Vinci Code facts, reading tons on Bonn and Germany, reading tons of books on applying to colleges, every fact I can get my hands on I absorb. I'm even tackling my dad's set of conservative non-fiction political books. Fun stuff, and there's no sarcasm there, it's awesome. We're going to some massive CML library, it's the new one, tomorrow. Then I can, well, read...everything. Germany, here I come.::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/08/2004 12:30:00 AM:.
...
.::Questions::.
::I came across these, and liked the idea. Answer away.

-How have you described me to people who have not met me?
-What is the best thing anyone has ever told you about me?
-What is the worst thing anyone has ever told you about me?
-What do you think is my most unusual or unique character trait?
-What was your initial impression of me when you first met me? How has that changed? ::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/07/2004 12:09:00 AM:.
...
.::Homesick::.
::Ladedadeda...

I said to Donna Curtis (I think?) that I don't really get homesick... I was only half right. I don't get homesick for my family, for old surroundings, for home. I get homesick for people; friends, family... places; Meck, NWSA...

Being called by mom... Will be back.::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/05/2004 06:53:00 PM:.

.::Happy 4th::.
::Oh, I don't like fireworks, not that close up.

I went to CoH today. It was the most fun I've had in Michigan yet. It was GREAT seeing everyone... the looks of surprise were positively hilarious and nice... oh, I should do that again...
It is the Anti-Meck... it is so very, very, VERY different.
But it has its own charm.

No one call my cell phone. It's been commandeered by my father. Ask me over IM for my home phone number.

This was a terrifying 4th. I hate close up fireworks, sparklers, firecrackers, and little kids running around with lighters. It's... scary. My Italian mafia uncle, who has never finished a book in his whole life and will gladly tell you so, set off three thousand dollars worth of fireworks. I thought I was going to die. All the adults were laughing at my cynical fireworks commentary but more than one had joined me underneath the nice safe curtain thingy before the end of the night. It was funny...hehehe.

Saw some special people today. Nice seeing you. Hope to see you again soon. Was sorta preoccupied, talking to everyone in the whole freaking church.... which was, today at least, a total of 36! Opposite of Meck.

Email me (if you don't have my email address, then do it to alexandriafortunato@yahoo.com, I don't want to post my normal email on here for fear of junk mail) and give me your address, everyone. I have all Michigan people's, I got those before moving last year, but if you live in NC and are not Nick, chances are I do not have your address. As a matter of fact, I am positive that I do not have your address. So give it to me. I want to send you postcards from Beethoven's house and other Bonn stuff, or if you're really lucky, a really, really long letter. I know I am incapable of writing short letters... so it's either postcard or long letter...
And if you're really lucky, you'll get a decorated envelope. If you're really, really, really, REALLY lucky, you'll get the totally awesome Finding Nemo one I just made, entirely inspired by Huz. Danke schoen, it turned out really cool... :)

Michigan is too COLD. I was wearing a SWEATER today!!! I mean... really!!! It's July, for the love of all that is good and holy!!! JULY!!! No sweaters should be worn in July (in the Northern Hemisphere at least, Cassie, ignore this rant...;-) hahaha)... ever!!!

agh, I am SO bored. I'm getting calculus lessons with Rick Filbey soon, I'm really excited actually. Only my mom keeps asking me when I'd like to meet with Rick and then I get all confused because it's the wrong state and all...

My cousin David is really awesome. I don't know why. He just is. Oh, Nick, something funny, he really wants your hair, he just recently dyed it and saw one of the, oh, three thousand NC pictures I brought over... hehehe.

Happy Christmas.::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/05/2004 12:24:00 AM:.
...
.::So...::.
::Yeah.
Erm, I'm sorry for not calling you back, I've been quite preoccupied, I'm calling tomorrow, I will...
I'm so exhausted. I can't sleep. I fall asleep around 2 or 3 in the morning, and wake up around 7 or 8. I do logic puzzles all hours of the night just to have something to do with my insomnia.
My AP scores ROYALLY SUCK. I'm SO DISAPPOINTED with my English. I wish I had done better with APUSH, I wasn't expecting to, but it saddens me anyway.
I suppose I could post them, it doesn't matter. English->4, APUSH->3. Sucky sucky sucky. I'm sure everyone else did a million times better. I should have studied more for APUSH, worked harder for English, memorised my Schemes and Tropes notebook, practiced more essays... agh.
Everything is just not cool right now. I want to go back to Charlotte SO badly...
In the Secret is finally up on the Meckarts website, I was really happy, but then as I was listening to it... homesickness kicked back in again. Yes, homesickness.
I normally don't mind moving, what's WRONG with me?!
ladedadeda, it's 12.15, I still can't sleep.
I am directly next door to my parents, I can't talk on the phone at night anymore. That's sad.
I've been studying the Bible at night, it's really fascinating. And doing logic puzzles. Studying stuff out of a calculus book, reading Harry Potter with a Whitesidean twist, studying Germany, learning all the words to every CD I own, or at least, what I didn't know already, studying the intricacies of a certain person's voice in the few recordings I have, because of the charlotte homesickness that's been wreaking havoc in the mind of Allison for the last few days. I'll be fine when I'm in Germany, but the whole Michigan thing just seems so pointless that I find it hard to cheer up.
We saw Spiderman 2. It was pretty good. I really liked it. Dr Otto Octavius is really awesome. Tobey Maguire is really cute. I mean, erm, I liked the movie for other reasons too. Tobey Maguire is not the reason I wanted to see it. Really. (I give this up. I am so unconvincing.)
I like calling Pepsi 'pop'. It's nice to be able to do so again.

Reasons I like Michigan:
1. Pop
2. Hanging out with the relatives on my mom's side.
3. I have a computer in my room.
4. I'm leaving it in three weeks and six days, possibly sooner!
5. Walking around downtown Lake Orion with Deanna, and swinging on the swings, and making fun of foundation and the RV convention.
6. Re-acquainting myself with David DiPiazza, great cousin...

Reasons I want to be anywhere but here:
1. Weather
2. It's not Charlotte...
3. No church
4. Forced hang-out time with my cousins on my dad's side
5. No money-making opportunities in the short time I'm here
6. I don't really like Michigan people in general, they're not very nice.
7. It's not really very interesting. I mean, all there is is to go Up North, which is a region basically three-fourths of the state of Michigan. I still think they should make shirts that say "My parents went to Upnorth, MI, and all they got me was this lousy T-shirt."
8. People aren't nice drivers either. Such a rush, always.
9. The little tiny house in the little tiny neighborhood with all the people who've lived here for like seventy years.

Jeez, I probably look so spoiled. Oh, pity me, I'm living in a place I don't want to. This is horrible. Ignore this entry when thinking of my personality. I'm just...... I don't know. I've had the opportunity to do so many great things, I mean, hello, I'm going to Germany in just a few weeks, I'm leaving for Tuebingen in only 29 days. Four weeks and one day. CIEE starts in three weeks and six days. I got to know all the wonderful, amazing people I know in Charlotte. I have all the mentors that I do, I have all the resources I do, I got to graduate, I have my whole life ahead of me, I'm only 15, Michigan isn't going to kill me and I might, horror upon horrors, find something I like about it.
But I don't WANT to see all of that right now. I need to have my fit of rage, I need to be able to cry more than anything else instead of sit around all night and be unable to sleep, unable to be upset, unable to do anything. I need emotion. No, I need release. I need a shoulder to cry on, or rather, an ear to complain to, a person to turn to, a place to go. I want someone from Charlotte, someone who is probably unaware of their importance, to tell me something that will make me feel a million times better. I need some sleep, I need something to go do, more time alone to brood but a better time and place to do it, and I need to go home. Is there anything else I can say? I need someone to turn to... someone who understands.... God, I wish I could magically create everything I need, suddenly do everything I want to do.




I'm going back to blaring my Christian music and searching the Bible for the meaning of loss. Oh, but I've already found it. Thank you, God, for being there...::

.:Arakatze blogged on 7/02/2004 12:08:00 AM:.
...